But then -- what's my option? If I want to say something critical about the community, or even just say that, hey, I have these other needs and desires that fandom often has trouble speaking to, what can I possibly say? Nothing, because fandom is too "embattled" to be able to deal with my dissent from the inside?
Lately my world seems full of people who want to pin fandom and fannishness down, to say this is what we do and this is how we do it -- in ways that, yes, sometimes are very reflective of me, but also sometimes are very not. And I want to be able to say, "Okay, that's a fair thing to say, but here's my stance, here's what I like and don't like about my interactions with the fan community." And I literally don't know how to do that anymore without pissing somebody off. Which I actually don't enjoy doing, and I'm so fucking exhausted with trying and failing miserably to interact with fandom in a way that guards my own needs at the same time that other fans don't feel as if I'm interfering with their needs.
I'm honestly -- I really need advice from someone. I don't know how to do this anymore. I know I'm not in the fannish mainstream and haven't been for many years now, but I don't mind being the loyal opposition, as long as I get to stay in the conversation. And obviously I need to learn some much better communicating skills. I really would take all advice under consideration at this point.
no subject
Date: 2007-06-22 02:29 am (UTC)From:Lately my world seems full of people who want to pin fandom and fannishness down, to say this is what we do and this is how we do it -- in ways that, yes, sometimes are very reflective of me, but also sometimes are very not. And I want to be able to say, "Okay, that's a fair thing to say, but here's my stance, here's what I like and don't like about my interactions with the fan community." And I literally don't know how to do that anymore without pissing somebody off. Which I actually don't enjoy doing, and I'm so fucking exhausted with trying and failing miserably to interact with fandom in a way that guards my own needs at the same time that other fans don't feel as if I'm interfering with their needs.
I'm honestly -- I really need advice from someone. I don't know how to do this anymore. I know I'm not in the fannish mainstream and haven't been for many years now, but I don't mind being the loyal opposition, as long as I get to stay in the conversation. And obviously I need to learn some much better communicating skills. I really would take all advice under consideration at this point.